Posts Tagged ‘Boyfriend’

Instant relationships seem to be very common these days. The longing to be with someone or to say that you have someone pressures people into these kinds of relationships. Being a single woman in her 30’s can be quite challenging. We are at an age where if we don’t have children, we start to think of having children because of the proverbial “clock” is ticking. However, we also don’t want to settle down
with someone just because he may seem at first glance a great catch. Lately, I have encountered men
who want instant relationships. They seem to want relationships after the first or second date…seriously, they do. I would like to know what happened to the days where you met someone, you went out on a few dates and during the process you actually got to know a person. You had a chance to study their habits as well as actually fall in love with them. Actually, the most recent date I went on felt more like a job interview than anything but I am happy that it went the way it went. I was able to find out things about him that his “resume” didn’t tell me about like his possessiveness. Let’s just say that I can see why he’s been single for 8 years. I would like to get to know someone naturally and fall in love with them. I don’t want to be rushed through the process. I am not saying that it should take someone a month or 2 to say that you are exclusive with someone, but what I am saying is that a person shouldn’t expect for you to become exclusive after the first date! Learn the difference between being alone and lonely. It is truly a difference and being alone isn’t all bad. Especially if you are settling with someone who doesn’t know you and you don’t really know them. I am not saying that these relationships don’t work, some actually do. However, I know quite a few that are nightmares, they are rosy looking on the outside but dark and dreary on the inside. I enjoy the initial excitement of meeting someone new and in order for me to progress forward with a person I must see something beyond the initial meeting. I will not however commit to someone without getting to know them. Have fun getting to know me. Learn what quirks, figure out some things about me that may annoy you, learn my favorite things, find something in my life that you can gradually include yourself in. Trust, I will do the same for you. But life isn’t a movie or song, The movie or songs are inspire by life’s events but those life event’s usually took some months and years in the making, not 2 dates…lol! Enjoy the process of dating. Finding your life partner can be difficult but what is more difficult is having to end something with someone that you probably shouldn’t have been with in the first place. Slow down and enjoy the process! Your King or Queen are on their way. Get yourself right first in order to attract that person.

© Brandi Anderson

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